Satisfy Any Woman
Seriously? Are they ever really satisfied?
Financial Aid – Student loans help finance further study!
Wow, who knew? And all this time I thought it was to help pay for building a meth lab. Boy, is my face red.
Liberty Medical – Your free glucose meter is waiting for you
Sorry I’m late! I got held up at my lunch meeting with proctoscope and enema bag. Next time we get an outside table.
WebMD – Get Lush, Sexy Lashes
And then what? Vajazzle my mangina?
Last Minute Gift - We Have The Answer
If the question is “Will I be dumb enough to listen to last minute gift-giving advice from some spammer who thinks I should buy something pictured on the internet from some company I’ve never heard of and count on them to deliver it to the right place on time?” then I bet you do have the answer.
Gain Credibility by Maximizing Your Productivity
And if you fail to maximize your productivity, just lie about it and say you did. (This works especially well for politicians.)
Non-profit job from home
But wait, isn’t that what I have now?
Single Christians In Your Area Are Looking For You
Hide me for Christ sakes! Whatever it is, I didn’t do it, I swear! I wasn’t even there! No, wait, Scientologists drugged me and forced me to do it. And I was too drunk to remember! HELP!
Please be assured that the above was written only in fun and if I have offended anyone, I am very sorry as that was definitely not my intention. It was meant only for me to blow off a little steam about spammers and not to anger, titillate or otherwise elicit any emotions other than amusement from my readers. If, however you were offended by my use of the word, "Penis", I do apologize and promise I will try very, very hard not to do so in the future.
And for the rest of you, "Penis, penis, penis, penis, penis, penis and penis."