Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's iPhone

With the recent unveiling of Apple's overly-hyped iPad the other day, I again got those feelings of Apple envy that first consumed me when the iPhone was initially released onto the gadget-loving masses. For $499 this appears to be a really cool (and reasonably affordable) device for cruising the web, sending emails, watching movies and videos, reading iBooks, listening to music, looking at pictures, running thousands of Apple apps and practically anything else you can do on your computer, but just on a smaller 9.7-inch LED-backlit IPS display with Multi-Touch screen.

Despite the very cool design of this tablet, I think that Apple could have waited a little bit longer and gone a little farther in development of this item before releasing it. Though they are releasing Wi-Fi models in a couple months and a 3G version a few weeks afterwards, it's still really pretty much just like a bigger-screen iPhone without some of its features.

Critics point out that the iPad fails to live up to it's hype by not yet being a viable option to laptops and netbooks. They cite the lack of a WebCam, no flash support, no HDMI, no multi-tasking, an uncomfortable keyboard and other reasons for why it fails to impress. I think I will wait until the later versions are released before I opt to pass judgement on it myself.

Still, the release of the tablet rekindled my interest in the iPhone again. Though I had long since gotten over my lust for an iPhone, and even turned down the opportunity to get one last year, I cannot help being impressed by the many wonderful apps that are available with it these days.

Sure, there's the usual, conventional apps that everyone takes for granted, such as business applications, games, iBooks, music, movies, and social networking stuff, but since its inception there have been so many really cool, weird and funny apps that have sprung up. That's the part I am envious about. I mean, who wouldn't want a phone that also doubled as a harmonica, a Jedi Knight's light saber or a construction level? Here are a few of my favorites:

MouthOff

As the video below explains, this app uses a variety of cartoon mouths which mimic your speech in real time so that the words you speak are animated onto the screen as you talk.

iBeer

This is a very realistic simulation of drinking a beer. The screen fills with beer such like a glass would fill with beer, including the white foam at the top, and as you tip the "glass" to your mouth, the beer level goes down accordingly. As you can see from the video below, it is a fun gag to watch. Similar apps are available for drinking soda and milk.

iPopcorn

Just like the iBeer app, the iPopcorn app starts with popcorn popping on your screen and it moves as you either pour it out or shake it or attempt to eat it. See the video below as words simply do not do it justice.

iPoo

Sorry, there's no video for iPoo, and yeah, it's probably a good thing. This app was designed to give you something to do while going poo. iPoo brings together people from all over the world who are actively engaged in taking a dump. You can create messages and draw graffiti on the virtual stalls to share with others in the iPoo community, see a map where others are currently going poop and see what has been posted where you are dropping your deuce.

iSnort

Virtually snorting cocaine is the premise for this iPhone app. Using very realistic imagery (so I'm told!) you use the edge of a credit card to break up the cocaine just as would if you were actually snorting coke (so I'm told!) and form it into separate lines just like real cocaine users do (so I'm told!). Then you can use a straw or rolled up dollar bill just like coke snorters do (so I'm told!) and starting at one end of the line start snorting the cocaine and watch as it magically disappears as if you were really snorting coke (so I'm told!) up into your nose. This is a lovely gag to do in public, and may be one way to expose undercover narcotics agents that may be within your midst (so I'm told!). Check out the video below.

iFart

My final app fave is the wildly successful iFart application. Not content to be a simple fart noise machine app, for there are a multitude of those available for iPhone, this app blends a rich tapestry of different fart sounds with elements of interactive social networking (aka Fart Budz) with the ability to prank your fellow "Fart buddies" by sending them random fart sounds when they least expect it. Let's face it, when it comes to making someone laugh, there's nothing that can compare to a really gross, smelly sounding fart. Check out the video.

Okay, admittedly these are not the most useful of apps and sure the gag will get old not long after you have shared them with your friends and co-workers, but for .99 each for most of them it's a cheap laugh. And these days, we can all use a good cheap laugh.