Saturday, July 3, 2010

Taking Back Our Freedom! A Saturday Centus




Jenny Matlock


Happy Saturday fellow lunatics and writer folk! It’s time once again to squeeze out some creative juices (remembering to lay down some newspaper first and being careful to avoid bruising) and dish up another 100-word helping of weirdness for the Saturday Centus, a themed writing meme hosted by Jenny Matlock at her blog, Jenny Matlock ...off on my tangent....

Every Saturday she posts a "prompt," a phrase that must be used in the essays of each contributor. Each story must contain the prompt as written and be a total of 100 words or less, not including the prompt words. Failure to comply with the rules is punishable by being the subject of the following weeks prompt in a very unflattering and humiliating fashion.

Okay, not really, but it does sound like that would be fun to try.

After posting their stories, the writers link up with Jenny's Saturday Centus meme post so that we can all share our treatment on the prompt and subject ourselves to carpal tunnel syndrome by leaving tons of comments on each other’s blogs. Then we head to the liquor cabinet and all drink a toast to Jenny Matlock. And then another, and then another, and then a few more…eventually the police are called. 

But I digress.

I encourage you all to step outside your comfort zone and give this a try if you haven’t yet. It’s actually a fun exercise in concise, tight writing and you will be amazed at what you can do in the space of only 100 words!

Many writers take their little stories and use them as building blocks for larger projects. Maybe “Twilight” started this way. Who knows? The point is, stop on by, read the other submissions from our talented bunch and give us your take on the prompt! Its fun, plus it may even help reduce wrinkles, burn calories and improve your love life as well.

Okay, so there’s no scientific evidence that this is true. It sounds reasonable though.

No literary babies were seriously harmed in the writing of this essay, although I doubt they will be playing piano at any point in the future. A small sacrifice, I say, in order to bring you yet another collection of words strung together in sentences decorated with punctuation marks. These are also known by us writers as “that stuff we type that people read…oh yeah, a story.” (Sorry, I just channeled my inner Dubya.)

The guest writer for this week’s prompt is the lovely and talented Sami of the blog, Sami by the Sea! Thanks Sami for a very creative prompt! Now if I can just get the sand out of my keyboard…

Here is this week's prompt:

"Are you sure that's the one you want?"


I felt a little lump in my throat as I peered down at my choice, held tightly in my hand. I didn't think this would be so nerve-wracking. Was I making the wrong decision? I couldn't agonize over this any longer.


I took a deep breath before managing to say, "... Yes, it is."


Here is my submission for this week. It is entitled:


Taking Back Our Freedom!


America is bleeding.

A crumbling economy. Widespread poverty and unemployment. Violent crime running amok.

All because we turned our backs on right-thinking, freedom-loving, gun-toting Americans like Sarah Palin.

We won’t make that mistake again.

Our own federal government, with its illegitimate, subversive leader, is gradually chipping away at our freedoms so you don’t notice our silent descent into slavery.  Gun control?  Ha!

But they won’t control me. Not anymore.

The weight of the Berretta PX4 9mm semi-automatic pistol felt good. I nodded to the clerk.

"Are you sure that's the one you want?"

I felt a little lump in my throat as I peered down at my choice, held tightly in my hand. I didn't think this would be so nerve-wracking. Was I making the wrong decision? I couldn't agonize over this any longer.


I took a deep breath before managing to say, "... Yes, it is."

Let’s just see who tries to steal my parking spot now.




Jenny Matlock

Yes, I'm disturbed, but not THAT disturbed!

30 comments:

  1. Whoa!

    I totally understand the rage of a good spot stolen right in front of you. I've been there. But what really concerns me is...

    "(Sorry, I just channeled my inner Dubya.)"

    Whoa.

    (And it's cuz I know you lean to the left...not that's there anything wrong with that. hee hee)

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  2. Um...Does this mean that your protagonist is "mad as hell and not going to take it anymore?"

    I guess so!

    ;)

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  3. OMG! That could be soooo real! You have made me askert! Here! Take my parking spot! Just help me get my wheelchair in my car first. Thank you.

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  4. Wow. How long have you been holding that in? It's always the ones you don't suspect that have neighbors later remarking to reporters, "He was always so friendly."

    ;)

    I have to try this sometime. It does look fun.

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  5. You surprised me with the last line! Good one!

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  6. Oh I love this one. Out of all I read, which really all are great, this one is my favorite. Thanks for sharing.
    I'm off to try and see what I can come up with.
    Take care and have a blessed Independece Day!!

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  7. You certainly got my attention with this one!

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  8. Is this guy my newly gun toting neighbor that scares me every time I see him?

    This one is powerful. Nicely done.

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  9. HAHA, you're so weirdly! I love it...

    So much truth in the tellin :)

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  10. Good one....love that surprise ending!

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  11. Delightfully twisted from paragraph 3 on....


    and this was equally great: Failure to comply with the rules is punishable by being the subject of the following weeks prompt in a very unflattering and humiliating fashion.

    If only it were true......

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  12. Fantastic piece of writing that had me squirming at the beginning. I was thinking how I could possibly comment! Excellent twist! Really good fun!

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  13. Your parking spot! too funny and here I was thinking man he has guts what if the gov reads this and thinks he is out to get them!

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  14. What kind of car do you drive? I'll make sure to give you the parking spot around town!

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  15. By any chance to you have a permit to carry a concealed handgun? I won't have to worry because I park a mile away so nobody dings my car. No one parks by me.

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  16. Sorry about stealing your spot. It won't happen again!

    ;-)

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  17. Ha,ha,ha. I should have known. At first I thought oh no, and then I lol. Great job.

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  18. Mwahahahaha! The best thing since sliced bread and scary as all hell!

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  19. You are clearly at your best after channeling your inner Dubya, Tgo. Keep the political satire going. It's really good stuff.
    PS Note to self: Don't cut this guy off in the Cosco parking lot to get the good space again.
    xoRobyn

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  20. Funny. The scary thing is you just discribed quite accurately about 500 thousand living breathing lunatics over here in Arizona.

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  21. Great stuff! I haven't laughed this hard in a long while. I never thought I'd recommend someone "channel their inner Dubya", but in this case...
    And your suggestion for punishment for not following the rules is priceless :) Kat

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  22. scary stuff. gets you thinkin what things would be like with a different president wouldnt it.

    Tina from
    Mummy Diaries
    Gossip Avenue
    Travel Shack
    Game FreakZ

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  23. Hello, found you from Kat's blog. I have been reading many of the submissions and feel as though i am on a literary crash course!

    Thoroughly enjoying myself...I might add.

    And I concur with your avid readers...this work was a jovial jaunt!

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  24. Hi There....you are on LOL today so link up and enjoy....!!

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  25. Your story scared me a little. I live in Texas. I think your character lives next door to me...and down the block...and across the alley. Of course, my fear of my neighbors (and of Sarah Palin) requires me to have my own firearms. :)

    Your introduction to your submission this week was friggin hilarious! Me? I copied and pasted. You are a good man!

    I was late on my submission this week. Hope you will stop by and read it though!

    Malisa

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  26. Wow..I guess your character has had enough. Sounds so much like a former militia, gun-building in the garage neighbor I had one time.

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  27. The same thing is happening here in the UK

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  28. Tom. I love the wit and sarcasm of your intros. I read them each week several times amused at your imagery and use of words.

    Twilight indeed! Who needs vampires when we can read your satire?

    And what a fabulous take on the prompt.

    A direction that would never have occurred to me but I'm just gonna say to you. Game on. I am gonna get as far out of my comfort zone as I can go without walking out of my underwear on tomorrows prompt!

    My chicken one from this week doesn't count.

    I have a challenge coming up for you as soon as I can figure out how to do it. You'll love it Tom!

    Thanks for always making me think, smile and try harder!

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