Monday, August 23, 2010

What I Did Over My Summer Vacation - A Saturday Centus

Jenny Matlock

This is my contribution for week 16 of Saturday Centus (fashionably late as usual) which is a fun and challenging themed writing meme hosted by the Erma Bombeck of the blogosphere, Jenny Matlock, at her blog Jenny Matlock, off on my tangent…..

This week our dear Mrs. Matlock has rattled our cages once again with an unexpected twist on the whole Saturday Centus meme thingamajig.  Usually she or a guest supplies a prompt, a phrase that we must use in our essays as written, but this week we have no prompt.  Instead she has given us the title of our essays from which we will base our stories. 

Seeing that it is back-to-school time again, this week Jenny is borrowing a lesson from our teachers from back in the day when they used to assign their students a theme to write entitled “What I Did Over My Summer Vacation” at the beginning of the school year. 

Given the current state of affairs in schools these days, that assignment has probably been updated to keep pace with the students and their promiscuous behaviors as “Who I Did Over My Summer Vacation” or “Where I Did It Over My Summer Vacation.” 

But I digress.

The rules this week are simple – exactly one hundred words total.  The title must be “What I Did Over My Summer Vacation.”  The essays can be fact or fiction but must be told in the first person.  That’s it!   Are you up to the task of writing a whole 100 words?  Considering that this paragraph alone has 70 words, I don’t think it is too daunting a task.

Step up and be a Centusian this week!  Link up your story to Jenny’s blog meme post and then just sit back and enjoy all the love and attention you get as a result.  I do it and I’ve even gotten marriage proposals from it!  A few were even from women!  So there you go.

Unlike my previous efforts, this one is actually based on a true story.  I have many other summer vacation stories, but this one was the least repressed of them all.  Most of the others are either to gruesome or embarrassing to recall here.

Speaking of embarrassing, have you ever had one of those awkward moments that you would rather forget? 

Like when you went to hug Grandpa Earl and he got an…um…that is to say that he got “too excited” and then he wouldn’t let go of you? 

And then he winked at you and called you Lucy, but your name was really Tom. 

And then he wet his lips like he was going to plant a big sloppy one on your kisser, but you gave him a karate chop and broke free before he could grab you and dashed out the door and escaped. 

Then you sat in the driver’s seat of your car and suddenly felt all creeped out and nasty like you had just been violated or something and started to cry.

Has that ever happened to you? 


Yeah, me neither. 

But wow, that would really mess with a guy’s mind I bet.  It might even make him write weird blog intros that were just a rambling mess of sophisticated lunacy.  Scary thought though, huh?

Yep, good thing we dodged that bullet.

Anyway, here is my EXACTLY 100 WORDS story this week.  As you would expect, I am entitling it:

What I Did Over My Summer Vacation

Backpacking alone into the wilderness, I braved the rugged terrain and blistering heat for hours before reaching a small, secluded lake with crystal clear waters that lay hushed, reflecting a curtain of towering pine trees, jagged granite cliffs and deep azure sky in its glassy surface.

I swam naked in the cool, soothing water, feeling at once primal and overwhelmingly in tune with nature.

At night the sky was ablaze with a view of the cosmos like none I had ever seen.

Though enveloped in its serene majesty, the forest yet denied me my quarry.

Where were you hiding, Bigfoot?

Jenny Matlock

Participate in Saturday Centus!  It may be the least offensive thing you do all day.



  1. As always, your intro cracked me up. And your story was great, I could smell the pine and feel the cool water. But Bigfoot? Really? Did you ever find him? Is he in a deep freeze in your garage? Inquiring minds want to know LOL

  2. so,thank goodness for your summer story, it was almost enough to clear out the "icky" of the uncle story! even if it was fiction - shudder! lol

  3. Ok. You got all me frazzled by the icky uncle story, that I just accidentally clicked on Post Comment and got a little red box appear with the words: Comment should not be empty.


    I'm still shuddering from the heebie jeebies! Hee hee.

    And then you go into a skinny dippy story with a possible Big Foot encounter?


    Do you really want to take on Big Foot while you are butt-nekkid?

    Thank goodness you didn't mention the Loch Ness monster! And an accidental meeting between it and your....never mind!

    You got my mind in the gutter!

    hee hee

  4. Dare I suggest that you have cheated ? well lI dare my reason is that you have given a perfectly eloquent commentry before hand that is way over the budget.
    Also please tell me what is a centusian?
    Just proves I read it all

  5. Do you know the difference between "naked" and "nekked"? "Naked" is when you don't have any clothes on, and "nekked" is when you don't have any clothes on and you're up to something.

  6. True story? About backpacking alone? My sons do a lot of backpacking, but I wouldn't like it if they went alone.

    Great job, but this one brought out my annoying mom instincts. (Makes you glad you're not one of my kids, I'll bet!)


  7. I think I saw Bigfoot hanging out with my neighbor's gnome. You were just backpacking in the wrong place.

    I liked your story but like Quirky, the weird uncle needs to go. ;-)

  8. Nice description of the water and the forest. (Nasty grandpa, btw.)

  9. Is this fact or fiction...I am a Bigfoot afficianado... Cool post...cold water ! Peace

  10. OMG, Big Foot LOL. I sure wasn't expecting that. Great Centus..

  11. Big Foot? Surprised me all to hell with that ending. Tom, that was one creepy story intro. Sheesh, I sure it isn't true.

  12. You always make me laugh...loved your descriptions in this Centus. The Earl story creeped me out, but that' what you wanted, right?

  13. that was fun - surprise intro & surprise ending!

  14. I heard that Big Foot shacked up with Grampa Earl. Thanks for the laughs and great writing as always, Tgo!

  15. I don't know which I enjoy more - your introductions or your essays! Your Grandpa Earl makes me glad I never met any of my grandpas!

    Your descriptions of your summer vacation were spot on, I felt like I was right there with you, but hey, that wouldn't have been right because a) I'm afraid of water so I wouldn't be swimming and b) SCREAM!! YOU are NAKED! and I'M NOT!

  16. My first time on your blog.
    You are sooo funny ... and you sure can write, I found myself listening to you rather than reading!!!
    Brilliant :o)

  17. how scary you was out there all alone tom! that is frightening for me without the bigfoot lol

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  19. Lucy! I thought we agreed to keep that proposal a secret?

    Geez. Ummm....

    But who actually want to propose to "Uncle" Grandpa Earl's favorite skinny dipping, big-foot hunting "nephew"!

    As always, I am laughing my butt off at your humor, trying to read it aloud to Mr. Jenny while spitting ice tea out of my nose and then, WHAM!, you get all poetic and prose-y (yes, that is so a word!) on me when you are finally:

    reaching a small, secluded lake with crystal clear waters that lay hushed, reflecting a curtain of towering pine trees, jagged granite cliffs and deep azure sky in its glassy surface.

    Tom, if I win the lottery I am starting a publishing house just to have you as my main writer. I think you might be the next Earl Bombeck.


  20. Get busy, Tom! You're behind! Your public awaits your Sophistocated Lunacy!!!


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